Naming Ourselves | Gender-Expansive Terminology

Greetings!

Moon Phase: Waxing Gibbous
Sun Phase: after Winter Solstice
Prayer: May you prioritize your sense of self
Affirmation: I am who I choose to be

yasmine (they/them), jelly of all trades here, reflecting on genderqueer and gender-expansive terminology. What terms do you like people to use when they refer to you? What terms do you like to use to refer to yourself? There could be many terms you like, there could be one. Perhaps this will aide you in finding or learning something new.

When working with the Anti-Violence Project, my perspective on gender-expansiveness became intertwined with transformative justice. Circadian, each of us could be someone new. We can use new names or words for ourselves. We can change negative habits, values, and beliefs. We can make new decisions or return to previous decisions.

For gender-expansive folks, many of us blossom from our rejection of socially-imposed terms, the gender binary and its expectations. For some, after breaking from expectations, we may not be eager to re-identify ourselves using specific terms, words that may have other expectations embedded in them. For some, naming ourselves, finding the embodied term, can feel self-, gender-, identity- and/or life-affirming. Naming ourselves can be vulnerable, playful, both. Naming ourselves can support us root in and reflect our authentic selves.

Here are a couple terminology resources for someone exploring terms for themself, or learning to support gender-expansive loved ones:

• Gender Neutral/Queer Titles by Gender Queeries
• 2SLGBTQI+ Terminology
• Androsexual/Androphile: people who are attracted to masculinity and/or external genitals.
• Agender/Genderless: a person with no identity to any gender; no gender affiliation
• Autoandrophilia: refers to a person with internal genitals who is sexually aroused at the thought or image or practice of having external genitalia.
• Gaff: a garment of clothing to support the tucking in of external genitalia.
• Gender Euphoria: feeling joy around the way your gender is presented and perceived by others. Feeling joy inside yourself as a result of how you express your gender.
• Socialized As Male/Female: raised to embody the societal characteristics of a certain gender or sex
• Terms Of Endearments: words and phases expressed to offer warmth, love and/or affection

Ultimately, gender is a life-long journey. Gender-expansiveness is not just adding more boxes for people to “fit” better into. If you find a box you like, that is beautiful. If we believe someone, ourself, can be completely new at any given moment, we can respect and welcome the ongoing exploration of everyone’s authentic selves. We can give ourselves and others the opportunity to try out different names, genders, terms, without the expectation of committing to them. Gender-expansiveness is a celebration of being able to move, paint, destroy, create, recycle the box, to mold the box into our very own star.

You may like to name your star, you may like your star to float, free, mysterious, through space. You may like both. Your exploration and journey is always welcome at Artistic Apothecary.

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